Pirates of the Gulf

Instant Expert

En route to Mombassa, Kenya.

Assignment – Somali Pirates take an American Vessel. April 8 2009.

Now the assumption is that all of us at all the time are instant experts on everything known to mankind (and or sisterhood kind, if you want to be PC). And often I find myself in a situation where to all honesty I know nothing about.

I have not cared about, worried about or even thought about Somali Pirate’s. In fact the last time I even remember thinking about Pirates was watching “Pirates of the Caribbean”. In which everything ends well and we are left with the glowing image of Captain Jack, being a scoundrel but a nice hero.

Flash-forward to reality, Somali Pirates seize yet another ship…. Oops this one is American flagged and the crew is all American. As opposed to being some foreign vessel crewed by Filipinos with a Greek Captain. Now we have breaking news.

The cold hard fact is as I fly in that when you commence an assignment we are so often totally devoid of knowledge of the story, that you could change names and places and nothing would really change.

However having read twenty articles on Somali Piracy written in the last year, including think tank reports the reality is that I have become an instant expert and will happily discuss any issue regarding piracy around Somali in the last decade.

It is not rocket science to become informed on a subject, but so often people have a preconceived opinion that they never bother to actually take the time to read up on an issue. It does not worry me that before I got on the plane this morning I knew nothing about the background to the assignment I am heading too, the reality is that now I am an instant expert.

For example –

The best method of repelling Pirates is not to throw tomatoes at them as they try to board as one crew did last year to no avail.

If you are taken hostage, relax the kidnappers are more likely to take you out to dinner at a new restaurant in town that has opened as a result of business improving due to piracy.

If you are a pirate and are captured in 99% of the cases the navy that captures you and takes you prisoner will simply take you back home and land you on a beach close by as they have no international law to prosecute you by and also the warships have no prison facilities so it is easier and quicker just to get rid of you.

When the Islamic Party took control of Somalia a year or so ago, it should be noted that piracy fell to 0%, they simply did not allow it. So lets forget the terrorists are controlling the pirates. When the Islamic Courts Union fell, piracy returned immediately.

The good news for Somali is that it is no longer considered a “Failed State”; the international consensus is that it is now a “Post Failed State”.

In the Northern area of Somalia, “Puntland” which accesses the Gulf of Aden, piracy has injected $35 million dollars into the local economy in the last year, not bad for a country whereby half the nation needs food aid.

The area involved with the Somali Pirates extends over 1.1 million square miles of sea; it takes fifteen minutes from a vessel seeing a pirate to being over run and captured. The most elaborate technical gizmos are useless against pirates, the best defense is to simply look out of the windows of the bridge and have eyes on the sea.

There have been no reports of rival pirate gangs (of which the estimate is ten gangs with 1000 members total) ever fighting each other; they just only care about money.

How do Somali Pirates get better? “Practice, practice, practice.”

Chasing Pirates with International Forces is as one serving Italian Officer notes is - “going after them in a 485ft long destroyer bristling with surface to air missiles and torpedoes, is like going after someone on a bicycle with a truck.

It will be interesting to see how the world and especially the US reacts to this issue and whether Islam phobia is bought up as an issue by the right wing commentators, because this is simply a matter of money, nothing else. Pure greed and bling with an AK47 attitude.

Winter of Discontent - Iceland

The following is an actual quote from the in-flight magazine on Icelandair:
"If you have had enough of the Lamb Testicles (Can one ever get enough) "
Now I thought Reykjavik Iceland would be a destination of Vikings and Fisherman, not frustrated contestants of "Fear Factor"

Try as we might of the next few days to see if this delicacy existed it was to prove allusive, although the Whale burger was mighty fine and did not taste like chicken.

What is it about Iceland that a nation of 300,000 people in an area smaller than Kentucky, has the oldest democratic Parliament in the world, (apparently in 930 some Viking decided democracy would be a fun experiment, in lieu of plunder and war and choose this island in the middle of the North Atlantic and to this day the Althing as they call there parliament exists).

The trouble is that a few years ago, a few modern Vikings in Armani suits decided to continue their heritage and launched global raids on financial institutions, everyone thought this was good and money poured into Iceland as it never had before, then as we all know, someone just had to ask some questions and all of a sudden the world discovered that the foreign exposure of Icelandic Banks was 10x the countries GDP.

Now it does not take a Rocket Scientist, let alone an Economist to figure out that they were in deep trouble.

The Stock Market dropped 94%, every Bank was nationalised, and the value of the local currency halved and the 3 month unemployment safety net is due to expire in a month. Add to this that in the good times every Icelander took out large loans to buy a new SUV or Mercedes and book overseas holidays, of course all loans were taken in foreign currencies and now everyone is about to default. End result the normally placid Icelander's took to the streets the other week, banged saucepans and threw rocks at the Parliament. Police came along bit of violence and the Government collapsed. The first elected administration in the world falls to the Economic crisis.

So with Correspondent Greg Palkot and Producer Tadek Markowski we arrived in Reykjavik to look at what happened and could this become a domino effect, as the Winter of Discontent spreads across Europe.

Now the first thing we should of realised in the worlds most Northern Capital city is that it does not get light enough to film before 11am , we found this out sitting around at breakfast at 8:30.

So at this point we decided to adapt the Icelandic approach to values, as everyone here can, change a tire, strip an engine, ride a horse, sail a boat, dress a sheep, cure a salmon and maintain an open mind about elves. If they can do this then we can film in the dark. It should also be pointed out that here "elves have to be asked before a new road is built" who and how the authorities ask was never answered.

So we ventured out onto the streets as the snow started to fall, locals also explained that they do not have four seasons here, only two: Bright and Dark. Which seemed very apt given that 9:30 it was still pitch black?

The shoot went well and before dark returned we were back in the hotel, editing a package for Special Report.

Thursday had been planned for Live Shots for the News Channel and the Business Channel. We had booked a hotel balcony overlooking Parliament Square; Hi Speed Internet had been established so that we communicate to New York. The only problem was that when we came to stream live. Nothing happened, Transmission could not see us, and the curse of the firewall was upon us. Ok Plan B swings into action.

Take the portable satellite dish down into the main square and find the bird in the sky. Never a problem from Afghanistan to Iraq it is a fairly routine matter of locking onto the bird. BUT, I pointed here, I pointed there I even pointed down to the ground and nothing, absolute silence. Back to the hotel and check if there were any provider issues as to why the satellite might not be found. And there on the main page of the provider a map showing temporary blacked out areas in the worlds as they realigned their satellites. A small black band was revealed affecting 3 countries on the entire planet – Greenland, Ireland and you guessed it "Iceland".

Strike 2 this was looking like a bad day was going to get worse technically speaking. However Greg found a hotel around the corner near the square and after a fast test using the camera built into the camera we had a link with New York established.

Thus from a nation that has produced 3 Miss Worlds, 1 Nobel Laureate, countless Worlds Strongest men and list amongst their greatest sporting achievements a Silver Medal for Handball (no one remembers who won the Gold) , we spent the day transmitting from a very cold balcony.



Although we never got to find the lamb testicles, there was a business that never lacked for hungry diners. A small hot dog stall that has been in business for 72 years, that according to Norse legend has "The best hot dogs in the Universe" and for the record they just could be.

Red & Blue at 3 am

The diehards remain, the celebs and want to be celebs down to the E list have left. Perhaps only the true believers will be able to claim that they witnessed history and yet everyone who has left will tell tales of how they were here and watched it. I doubt that half the people here know the difference between the donkey and the elephant and who is blue and who is red.
Speaking of colors Correspondent Greg Palkot and I almost had a heart attack when the embassy map showed the state of New York as red before they changed it to blue , apparently the computers colors everything red first , and then you have to change it.
In the next hour I hope to witness history , perhaps that is why working in the media is magic at times, then again anything is better than two weeks ago in Afghanistan

1am London , 8pm Eastern

The hard thing about time differences is that over here it is already tomorrow and yet the time on the East Coast is 8pm. And watching various monitors around the embassy you are beseiged by the flashing of figures across screens, we cannot contribute much as there is no reaction to results because they are still to be counted. The mood of the party makes me wish that I had spent more time reading celebrity magazines like Hello as the guest list here grows and given that the locals have not figured out how to turn on the air conditioners correctly. Most of the guests sip white wine and try to network amongst themselves. The map on the wall has only two states colored and the cut outs have finally become somewhat irrelevant as almost everyone has had their photo taken with them. It appears that we will still be here at 3am at least providing those chads are a thing of the past.

Midnight at the Embassy

London Update Midnight , 7pm Eastern
The official results are still not being called and thus the party continues here in the Embassy spilling over three floors, with Burger King and Subway doing a roaring trade in the basement where we cannot film. The Obama cut out is just about faded with the number of flash bulbs . It is hard to determine a mood as people seem more interested in socialising than watching history unfold and the large projected map on the wall has no figures yet the next hour will be fascinating

Polls Closing

London 11pm
Party in full swing now , complete with Starbucks coffe man walking around and a lady who must of been paid a lot to dress up as the statue of Liberty. The Mc Cain cut out is a lone figure not suffering from the flashbulbs. Oh and as Iwas walking thru the crowd I thought I had pushed someone so I turned and said sorry, it was the Sarah Pallin cut out .

Countdown to History

US Embassy
London

Local Time 9 pm , East Coast Time 4 pm

Sitting in the Via Reception room at the US Embassy here in London, is somewhat of a weird place to observe a moment in history , that is likely to happen in the coming hours, The local evening newspapers here in London have all agreed that Barack Obama is likely in the coming hours to become the next President and here in the Reception room there are four cardboard cutouts of the candidates where you can have your photo taken with your favorite so far no one has had a photo taken with Mc Cain or Joe Biden. Obama is the favorite thou Pallin is popular because she is shorter.

We all remember where we were in great moments of history, Man on the Moon, 911 attacks and perhaps tonight the next defining moment a black man becomes President of the USA.

Apart from that we wait till the early hours of the morning here, as we are five hours ahead of New York and it is most likely that we will be here till 4 in the morning.

Meanwhile the Obama cut out remains the most popular and if that is any indication of the cut out exit poll, perhaps the night will not be that long. And history may start a little bit earlier.